{"id":2488,"date":"2014-09-16T19:35:49","date_gmt":"2014-09-17T02:35:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/spclarke.com\/?page_id=2488"},"modified":"2014-09-16T19:35:49","modified_gmt":"2014-09-17T02:35:49","slug":"hands-cheese","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/spclarke.com\/?page_id=2488","title":{"rendered":"Hands of Cheese"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>There were no birds<\/p>\n<p>soaring the dimlit morning sky,<\/p>\n<p>that day the man<\/p>\n<p>first became aware<\/p>\n<p>of the ply of his disease.<\/p>\n<p>There was no warning,<\/p>\n<p>that dogless morning,<\/p>\n<p>when his hands began to turn to cheese.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The man was struck by several questions:<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>From what kind of cheese were his hands made?<\/li>\n<li>Could one survive on a diet comprised<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>entirely of his hands?<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li>Would his hands mold?<\/li>\n<li>About the remainder of his body&#8230;<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The man could find no answers.<\/p>\n<p>He worried about work.<\/p>\n<p>And what would his friends say?<\/p>\n<p>Could he ever convey to them<\/p>\n<p>the agonies<\/p>\n<p>of hands of cheese?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The Lady of Rats<\/p>\n<p>was trying on hats in her flat<\/p>\n<p>on that tragic afternoon,<\/p>\n<p>That Saturday afternoon when her cat&#8212; Siamese,<\/p>\n<p>was overran<\/p>\n<p>by the man with the hands of cheese.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Lady of Rats ran screaming from her flat,<\/p>\n<p>to her cat,<\/p>\n<p>which lay dead in the street;<\/p>\n<p>Screaming,<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;You killed my cat, you lumber Jack,<\/p>\n<p>Why your hands&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>They&#8217;re made of cheese !&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>A silence hung between the two<\/p>\n<p>like an amber cannonball,<\/p>\n<p>As the man considered the possibilities.<\/p>\n<p>But the Lady of Rats she knew<\/p>\n<p>Opportunities like that<\/p>\n<p>never grew on trees.<\/p>\n<p>And, quick as sand,<\/p>\n<p>she devoured the man&#8217;s hands of cheese.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The moral:<\/p>\n<p>If one shows his hand,<\/p>\n<p>It could get chewed off.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Fall 1975<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There were no birds soaring the dimlit morning sky, that day the man first became aware of the ply of his disease. There was no warning, that dogless morning, when his hands began to turn to cheese. &nbsp; The man &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/spclarke.com\/?page_id=2488\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"parent":2441,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Hands of Cheese - spclarke.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/spclarke.com\/?page_id=2488\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Hands of Cheese - spclarke.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"There were no birds soaring the dimlit morning sky, that day the man first became aware of the ply of his disease. 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